Laptop Lamentations

Oh woe is me!

It appears the power cord for my beloved laptop has gone kaput. So, my posting will be even more sporadic than normal. The Hub doesn't like to share his computer sometimes and I don't return to work until Sunday night.

Fingers crossed I can find a replacement quickly!

Say Wha? Wednesday

Because everybody needs a good laugh now and then, I bring you "The Mysterious Ticking Noise" by the Potter Puppet Pals via YouTube.

I'll never be able to read another Harry Potter book without singing this in my head.

Living My Dream

This week's Carnival topic from the CHBMs, “What’s your dream job? (Other than Motherhood)”.


You know, when I first read this topic, I thought it would be easy. Turns out, not so much, for me at least. I've thought about this for the better part of two days. It's not that I have never thought of something that could be classified as my "dream job". I have, check out my "through the years" list...

Elementary School
Secretary
Jockey
Veterinarian

Middle School Years
Astronaut
Lawyer
Bartender

High School Years
High School Band Director
Professional Flag Twirler
Professional Musician (flute/piccolo)

College Years
International Businesswoman
Director (television)
International Field Producer

Post-College Years
PR Director for hockey team
Special Projects Producer
Teacher

That's an interesting list, to be sure.... but now, I look at all of those jobs and wonder how I could have ever thought of them as dream jobs. They can't even compare with what I do now.

I get up every day, sometimes quite tired, but looking forward to what lies ahead. On the job I heal, nurture, teach, love and observe. Then, I actually leave and go to "work".

Though I never knew it before July 2005, being a mother is my dream job. I realize I'm not really following the Carnival question. But I'm being honest. I couldn't and wouldn't trade my "job" as a Mom for anything.

Sure, being a tv news producer can be exciting, but it can't be compared to being a Mom.

What's better...

Getting the big story of the day on the air flawlessly or lifting Googie into the air, inspiring her fits of giggles and adorable grins and making silly faces at Soupy until he grins and coos at me, laughing that adorable baby laugh?

Counting down the anchors to hit a perfect live interview with a network correspondent or sitting with Googie and Soupy counting down to the newest episode of "The Backyardigans"?

Being the first station on the air with a "breaking news story" or being the first person Googie or Soupy see when they wake up from a nap?

Sure, I have to deal with poopie diapers at home. And when I go to work, there's rarely a day when I'm not up to my waist in some newsroom "bullshit". I don't mind cleaning up after my kids. One day they will be potty trained. The other adults I work with, not so much.

Being a news producer isn't bad, I've done it for more than a decade. When it comes to bringing home a "paycheck", there's nothing else I can imagine myself doing right now.

But when it comes to my dream job... you can't beat being Mom. Sure there are really long hours, no vacation time or sick time.... but the benefits are amazing.

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs in my field, since the payment is pure love. ~Mildred B. Vermont

So... Crow Was Kidding

Or was she?

Either way, the Great Toilet Paper Rationing Scare is over.

No more fear of not Having A Square To Spare... Feel free to grab a few more squares on your next trip to the loo!

Abracadabra!

Jennifer, my playgroupie pal's Ballsy post this morning made me think of a newfound "beauty" product.



Magic Powder. It's like magic... sort of...

Well, magic that smells a little nasty... and burns a little, if you aren't careful.


For those of you that don't know, Magic Powder is a depilatory designed for African-American men to use instead of shaving. It helps stop razor bumps. But it also works on other body parts... if you are CAREFUL.



I first learned of Magic Powder from an internet debate board (well, the chit chat part of said debate board...). Some of the young women on the board suggested using the product on their... ahem... LadyGarden.



So I decided to try it.



First, let me tell you, foul does not even begin to describe just how terrible this stuff smells. It's bad. For some, the smell is enough to convince them to abandon the Powderiffic LadyGarden-tending. But you must push past the smell. It does not linger once you are finished.



Basically, you mix the Magic Powder with ordinary tap water, to form a paste. Then you rub the Magic Powder paste on the area you would like to render hairless. Follow the directions on the length of time the powder should remain on your body... but do not leave it on for longer than advised.



I mean it. Don't do it. Don't think you have let your LadyGarden get too overgrown so you need some extra work done.



Trust me. You don't.


I speak from experience here, ladies. Absorb the LadyGarden-tending via Magic Powder wisdom I am imparting to you. It will save you a world of hurt.

Now, the directions say to use a spatula to scrape away the paste. You can do that, if you want. I will NEVAH.EVAH. do that again. Let's just say, I lost a little more than some unwanted hair in the process. I paid for my mistake with pain for several days. One of the members of the debate board advised using one of those pouffy shower loofah thingie-ma-bobs.


They look like that.



The hair just rinses away. Abracadabra! Hocus Pocus! Walla Walla Washington! Newport News!

You'll enjoy a nice smooth area for a few days. And when your LadyGarden begins to remerge, you'll notice it's softer, smoother, nicer. No ugly razor burn. No ingrown hairs.


But remember, be careful with any spatula-like implement. You'll thank me later.

40+ Year Old Children

"From the nursery to the newsroom, I'm used to dealing with lots of whining."

Why can't adults act like adults? Why do I have to hold someone's hand to get them to do their job?

Why?

WHY?

WHYYYYYY?

I am so glad I'm only on the job for another hour.

Harumph!

We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Blog....

for this brief public service announcement.

From here forward, the infant formerly known as BB will go by a new nickname. Don't worry, it won't be an unpronounceable syllable a la' Prince, back in the day. We've just struggled here at home with a good nickname for him. The Hub has had his heart set on "Soupy" and if you know our boy's real name, you'll get the connection. Of course, The Hub doesn't get credit for the "witty tie-in" as he stole it from a player on our local minor league hockey team.

So, at least for now, BB or Little Man is now "Soupy".

That is all.

Can You Spare A Square?

Evidently, if you asked Sheryl Crow, she'd say, "I'm sorry, I don't have a square to spare."

And she likely wouldn't have a square to spare, because she thinks we should only use one square per trip to the restroom. Ms. Crow has decided to fight global warming by cracking down on just how much poo paper I use.

"I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where two to three could be required." Sheryl Crow wipes away global warming

To be honest, the one square thing doesn't bother me as much as the two-three square limit for those, as she says, "pesky occasions". I can handle a wet hand... but the other? No way, Jose.

Look, I'm all for fighting global warming. I don't want polar bears to die. I don't want the glaciers to melt. I don't want the human race to die out. But I'm not rationing my 2-ply at this point. AIN'T.GONNA.DO.IT.

Get back to me when you've cracked down on the Hummer-driving, non-recycling, energy-wasting peeps in the world first.... then we'll talk.

Don't Stop The Carnival!

So I think I'm finally starting to get the hang of this blogging thing! I surfed over to the Crazy Hip Blog Mamas site. Their motto: "A little crazy, a lot hip, and ALL mama!" I like it! Crazy is ALWAYS good in my book! Hip? Well, I've got two of them... does that count? And I'm definitely a mama!


So, the Mamas site offers up the Carnival of the Crazy Hip Mamas every Wednesday. This week's installment: Favorite Beauty Secret/Product. Ok, I'll play along. I could always use some tips/tricks/suggestions! I'll even offer up one of my own.

My Favorite Beauty Product would have to be this:

M*A*C's Clear Lipglass

Now, I like a good lip gloss. But this stuff is different. It's gloss, without the tint! You can use it over your favorite lipstick and voilà, instant shine! It's even great to wear by itself. And a little goes a LONG way! I've had my same tube of lipglass for a couple of years!

But get this... it doesn't just come in clear! They offer tinted lipglass too.... with GREAT names: Standing Ovation, Taupe Notch, Shock-o-late, Prrrr!

If no other part of my face is "made up", I can guarantee you, I will have lipstick/gloss or lipglass on. It's just how I am!

So, go... now... pick up a tube of lipglass!

And head over to to CHBM to read some of the other Products/Tips our fellow Mommy bloggers have left! Sign up and leave your own or leave it here in the comment section! I'm always looking for new stuff to try!

The Sounds of Motherhood

As most Moms know, pregnancy occasionally brings uncontrollable flatulence... sometimes REALLY LOUD, uncontrollable flatulence.

Back when I was pregnant with BB, Googie and I were shopping at the FABUless Tarzhay when I felt it. It being the urge to let one hopefully sneak out undetected by my fellow shoppers.

I steered Googie to an uninhabited aisle in the baby section and let it slip. The sound was likely undetectable to any living thing outside of a 1/2 foot radius of my rear.

Well, to anything BUT Googie. Evidently my child has supersonic hearing. That AND the urge to become a town crier.

"Momma! Poo poo!!! Momma!! Poo poo! Stinky Poo poo! Momma P-U!"

Ahhh.. the joys of motherhood!

Oh and for the record... it WAS NOT stinky.

Déjà vu

August 2005
Mom and Googie


April 2007
Mom and BB

"It's Just Live TV"

Today I am missing a friend and a mentor... because today I learned of his death.

It's funny. We get so busy with our lives, we "forget" people. It's not intentional. It happens to us all at one time or another. And that's the case with R.B.

Let me tell you a little about R.B. He loved the news business. He loved the Florida Gators (his alma mater). He loved politics (when most of us would groan about some inane story idea he was so passionate about). He loved to argue... and he loved to think he was always right. I can remember always taking pleasure in the rare occasions I could prove him wrong. If you knew him, you'd understand why.

R.B. retired last October from our station. He was moving to the mountains to be closer to his kids and grandkids. He loved them so. He would often brag about his grandsons to me, sharing photos of them, telling me what funny little things they had done while he visited.

He loved all children. R.B. always enjoyed seeing pictures of Miss Googie, loved to dance and play peek a boo with her when she came to visit me here at work. She loved him right back. He never got the chance to meet Cam. I don't know if he ever even knew Cam had been born. I never got around to sharing the news with him. That makes me sad.

R.B. taught me a lot about the news business. He taught me even more about life. It's one in the same and it will always stick with me... "It's just live tv". Something would go wrong during a newscast. You'd turn to R.B., ready to spit nails you'd be so pissed... and he'd just sigh and say "It's just live tv". That was his way of saying, don't sweat the small stuff. And he was right.

At the end of the day, after a disaster of a show on air... R.B. could head out of the newsroom and leave all the crap at the door. After all, "It's just live tv". Shit happens, so to speak. Don't carry it home to the family.

I try to remember those words every day. I like to think of it as carrying a little bit of R.B. with me.

You'll be missed, R.B. Thanks for everything! When things get bad, I'll always try to remember to say... "It's just live tv."

A La Trois

I'm a few days late... Hey... 3 days late for a Meme on 3s! See, I meant to do that. Really. anyhoo, thanks Heather for bestowing this "Meme3" honor on me!

Three Things That Scare Me:
1. The dark
2. Spiders
3. Being alone in the middle of the night at the station where I work (it's haunted)

Three People Who Make Me Laugh:
1. The Hub
2. Melanie
3. Bill R.

Three Things I Love:
1. My Purple Crocs complete with a bright orange flower Jibbitz
2. My birthstone ring from The Hub
3. Pina Coladas

Three Things I Hate:
1. Loud cellphone talkers
2. Kids on Heelies in stores/shopping malls
3. Carrots

Three Things I Don’t Understand:
1. A man's reasoning (most of the time)
2. Latin
3. Consultants

Three Things On My Desk:
1. A shot glass from New Orleans
2. A purple Buddha statue
3. My purse

Three Things I'm Doing Right Now:
1. Watching "Charmed"
2. Drinking Ice Water
3. Watching the Clock

Three Things I Want To Do Before I Die:
1. Visit British Columbia
2. Swim with dolphins
3. Play hockey

Three Things I Can Do:
1. Flip my eyelids
2. Read tarot cards
3. Take pretty good photos

Three Things I Can’t Do:
1. Sew (yet)
2. Write an intriguing blog entry
3. Keep my desk at work organized

Three Things I Think You Should Listen To:
1. Your mother
2. The wind
3. The voices in your head

Three Things You Should Never Listen To:
1. Bill O'Reilly
2. Sanjaya from American Idol
3. Little Green Men

Three Things I’d Like To Learn:
1. How to sew
2. Latin
3. bellydancing

Three Favorite Foods:
1. Mexican!
2. Pizza
3. Italian

Three Shows I Watched As A Kid:
1. Captain Kangaroo
2. CHIPs
3. That's Incredible!

Three Things I Regret:
1. Giving up the chance to march in a drum corps
2. Not sleeping later yesterday
3. Eating that Chicken Burrito

I don't really have anyone to tag, as I don't know a lot of other bloggers all that well, at the moment. If you'd like me to tag you, just let me know!

Easter Poops

Ahhh, the sweet, sugary confection known as the Peep. I think they are too cute. But one thing you should know about the marshmallow candy... don't mock them. They like to get revenge. Seriously.

Come with me on a trip in the wayback machine, would you? Back several years... to a time before we had Googie or BB. The Hub and I got the bright idea to create a chocolate version of the marshmallow treat. So, we bought marshmallow fluff and added in some melted chocolate chips. Sinfully delicious.

But we couldn't stop there. Oh no. You see, I wanted to do a play on the "Peep" name. Now, being the type of people who really enjoy potty humor... what in the world could we have possibly come up with? I mean, chocolate marshmallow versions of a Peep. Hmmm... wait for it... you know what it is already, right... ok... here it is...

Yes, my friends, we decided to create Easter Poops. There we were with out chocolate bowl of chocolate-flavored marshmallow fluff and a piping bag. But wait... there's more. Why not throw in some chopped nuts... for texture! In went a cup or two of chopped almonds, if I remember correctly. So, there we were... ready to make nutty Easter Poops.

But, I couldn't stop there. Oh no. I added the Pièce de résistance You know those mini M&M's? I bought a bag. I seperated the colors into little piles. We decided M&Ms would be a nice addition to our Easter Poops. And just to carry out our theme a little more, we chose to use just the yellow ones. You know why. They looked like little niblets of corn.

There we were, giggling with childish abandon at the edible treats with a twist of potty humor we were about to make using a bowl of chocolate-flavored marshmallow fluff with chopped nuts and yellow mini M&M's. We scooped the mixture into the piping bag and proceeded to pipe it all out onto some wax paper. We got a little artsy and decided to make logs of Easter Poops, little Easter Pooplets, piles of dog-like Easter Poops... you name it, we created it.

And so, the Easter Poop was born. But, I angered the Peep Gods that day, my friends. And they knew, revenge is a dish best served cold. They waited... for years.... looking for the perfect time to strike. That perfect time was this past weekend.

While most homes were visited by the Easter Bunny over the weekend, it seems the Stomach Bug decided he'd stop by my house, too. Saturday afternoon, poor little BB started throwing up. He traded in his bottles of expensive, hypoallergenic (and incredibly stinky) baby formula for expensive, electrolyte-replacing (and fruity smelling) Pedialyte.

But one little 8 week old sick baby wasn't enough for our house. Oh No. Mr. Stomach Bug decided to get up close and personal with the Hub and Googie. In fact, yours truly was the only one immune to SB's charms. While the rest of my little family crashed early Saturday evening, I got to give the Easter Bunny a hand and put together my first Easter Baskets for my kids!

Not too bad for my first year actually playing the part of the Easter Bunny... if I do say so myself.


Googie scored big with jelly beans, organic chocolate eggs, 2 count 'em 2 easter bunnies, Backyardigans silverware, a Doodle Pro and (not pictured) a huge toy the Hub picked out to help her with her ABC's.




Googie, bed head and all, really loved her basket. I don't know what had her more excited.... the candy or the toys.

Lest you think I forgot about BB... he also scored with candy that will be enjoyed on his behalf by yours truly and the Hub. I also picked up some cute little stuffed rattles for the little man and the little dangly things for his car seat. I just didn't get any photos of him because he was a grumpy guss all day. I might have to go ahead and take some now that he's well.

In fact, everyone is back to normal now, thankfully.

The paypack poops for the Easter Poops from the Easter Peeps have finally left our home. Wonder what delightful deity I can piss off on our next holiday?

Tag... I'm It!

Sara over at Surburban Oblivion tagged me today with these questions!

1. Why did you decide to start a blog?
I write for a living. Every day (actually night) at work, for most of the day (night), I write. But I rarely get to be really creative. So I started writing blogs on my MySpace page and decided to branch out and publish them here.

I'm still a fledgling blogger and my writing isn't always super interesting. Heck, I have a ton of drafts I've yet to publish. I start writing them and just "run out of steam" because I feel they are too boring. Hopefully my creative juices will start flowing again now that I'm back at work.


2. How do you balance the demands of motherhood with blogging?
I guess that is another reason why I have so many blog drafts and very few things published on a weekly basis. When I'm not at work, I'm generally either asleep or I'm alone with the kids. Cooking, laundry, cleaning and playing with and tending to Googie and BB consume much of my "free time" at home.

Once I get back into the groove of work, I'm hoping to be able to write a bit more during my downtime.


3. What is your top pet peeve?
You want my top pet peeve? I don't know that I could narrow it down to just one. Here's a glimpse at the short list.

• Inconsiderate people, particularly in grocery stores and other public places
• Crazy arse drivers
• People who use outside voices during cell phone conversations
• My neighbor and his dogs

4. What is one thing about yourself that you are trying to change?
I'm trying to become more health conscious. Life is short and I have two beautiful children to care for and watch on their journey. I want to be around as long as possible.


5. How do you unwind when the stress of daily life gets to you?
I try to center in on my kids. BB is starting to smile and really interact with us and there is nothing more heartwarming than that gummy grin! Googie makes me laugh as she makes up games to play. The innocence of childhood can really help wash away the stupid stress of life.


There you go! Do I get a lollipop! :D

All Aboard The Funbus!

Heather over at The Queen of Shake-Shake tagged me with a meme all about FUN. So let's climb aboard the Funbus!


1. What is the #1 thing you like to do for fun? Why?
I'd have to say spending time with my family. The Hub and I have always been able to make just about anything fun. Heck, our weekly trip to the grocery store can be exciting. I don't know if that says something good or bad about us!?!?! Are so boring that deciding what brand trash bag to buy is exciting? Or are we just such fun people that even mundane tasks can be enjoyable when we are involved. I dunno.


2. When is the last time you had fun doing the above?
When we went shopping for Easter Basket treats for the kids this afternoon. This is the first year we're actually doing a "basket" for Googie and it's BB's first Easter.


3. What is the most fun you've ever had with friends?
Oh gosh... I'm gonna have to go with recently. It had to be back in October at a certain friend's birthday party. I may or may not have brought a pan of "adult themed" cupcakes. Or it could have been the Pina Colada day a few weeks ago.


4. Between you and your husband, who is more fun as a person?
On the surface, it would probably be me, because The Hub is quite the introvert until he gets to know you.


5. What is one of your "fun" goals? (Something you want to do in the name of fun but haven't yet.)
Go away for a night or a weekend with my new "Mommy" friends... maybe to Bourbon Street or a condo on the beach. It could happen! At least, I hope it does!


There you go... all the fun and excitement one can handle! I'm about to pee my pants, I'm just so exciting!

I'm A Copycat

I can't help it. I see things on other blogs and I think, "Hey! Maybe I should do that too!"

Sara over at Suburban Oblivion got me started on the Feedblitz updates and the MyBlogLog Community. It's nice to see who is stopping by to read my blog.

I'm going to start replying to the comments you leave. An idea I've seen on many blogs, most recently over at Jennifer's place at Playgroups Are No Place For Children It seems like the polite thing to do!

And as soon as I can pick up a few books and start reading, I'll likely add a little book list to my sidebar a la' Heather over at The Queen of Shake-Shake.

I just wanted to give a little shout-out to my girls for the inspiration! Now if I can just actually find the time to sit down and write more and not be interrupted with Googie begging for juice or BB waking up and ready to eat. One-handed typing just takes too long for blogging purposes.

Eating My Words

It wasn't long ago I remember complaining to some of my friends how disappointed I was in the selection of clothes for baby boys. Everything, in my opinion, was too "cutesy"... baby blue, with little doggies or bears or cartoonish dinosaurs.

I wasn't going to dress my baby in that.

No Sir.

Nun uh.

No way.

Nevah.

If it hadn't been for my wonderful friends and the surprise shower they threw for me about a month before BB was born, the poor child probably wouldn't have had any clothes!

Well, that is not entirely true. I found some adorable things at Old Navy, sans the cutesy puppy dogs or dinosaurs.

Then BB was born. I took some gowns and onesies to the hospital for him because he was outgrowing the hospital outfits. One in particular, from Her Highness over at Queen of Shake-Shake, was a blue gown with little doggies on it.

Yes, one of the aforementioned things I thought was "too cutesy".

Only, when I put it on BB, he looked ADORABLE. PRECIOUS. So, of course, what did I do? Well, I went right out and bought more onesies and gowns with doggies and dinos!

So yes, I'm eating my words. I should have deferred to Her Highness, a mother of two boys, when it came to cute boy clothing. She knew what she was talking about.

That doesn't mean BB doesn't have some non-cutesy stuff. He does. I bought him an adorable pin stripe button down and khaki cargo pants from Old Navy. He looks like an itty bitty man when he wears that outfit. ADORABLE.

But, I still love the doggies!